I typed a history and physical on a local figure who is due for colonoscopy. There are so many people who would pay to help the doc on this one that it keeps giving me the giggles.
It's just weird. I know families love and depend on each other, but four sisters getting colonoscopies on two subsequent days so they can attend to each other on the opposite days is just really, really creepy. Did they plan it over lunch? There is no family history of cancer or polyps, so that means they're all screening colonoscopies, which means they up and decided to do it--together. They're going to be sharing and sharing alike when it comes prep time--I wonder if they'll live through, "She's hogging the bathroom!"
I just realized that I haven't taken more than 12 Prilosec since quitting for D. Wow. This is despite my ibuprofen usage staying the same. I know it probably doesn't sound like a lot, but I went through Prilosec daily as well as multiple bottles of Tums (generic equivalent) a month. It's really nice to hear the hub ask for the Tums instead of the other way around!
10:20 p.m. - I hope, hope, hope...there is a line of storms moving through the midwest, spreading from OK in a solid wall pushing toward us. We've got some already, but, dangit, I could sure use the kids not having school tomorrow. Apparently, I've managed to get a stomach bug. Yay, me. See "boomerang" post. Geez, it was only head lice I was wishing on this person!
10:48 p.m. - Interesting evening, to say the least. Guy comes in, has warts WAY up inside his rectum. Blames the wife. Yeah, doc didn't buy it either.
11:36 p.m. - I just critiqued a 5-minute speech written in about that much time with about that much forethought by a 16-year-old who had two weeks to write said speech. He was doing so much better...and, yay me again, we get to play the same game until May, when he has to turn in a research paper on an environmental issue.
"What frosts you about the environment?" I asked.
"I don't pay any attention," he says. "Are you going to help me?"
"Have you picked a topic?"
"No." Sorry, son, who's been with me the longest, you should know by now that, without a topic, I can't even begin to direct you. I foresee long nights of IM communiques. Dammit, I'm going to have to teach him how to write references. Ibid, ibid, ibid, in excelcious deo, amen.
5:56 a.m. - Awake after a 3-hour nap. I woke up and, to my delight, the kids have no school. Yay. I can whine about body aches, stomach pains, and flu until the kids get tired of listening, leave me completely alone, and I can sleep the sleep of ages. I have to finish work first, tho. Yay, me.
6:22 a.m. - You know, I can take a break to discover my name's hidden powers...the e-mail says so!
Nah. Those things are always a little disappointing. I always *almost* have it all. I suspect that is the big draw, tho. You keep following the advice and hopefully, in time, have it all.
6:48 a.m. - Good indicator that you don't feel well: Your 18-pound cat hops down from the back of your chair, scaring the shit fuzzy fuck out of you, and you never realized his tubby self got up there to begin with. He must've snuck up there while I was contemplating how one of our local physician's names sounds like something a mobile patient with a urinary catheter straps to his/her leg for discreet outings, "Oh, full leg baggy." I am so flippin' warped. At least it temporarily overrides my fixation with Dr. Dick Head. Please add this to the fact that the only reason I'm still awake and typing is in the off chance that one of my kids wakes up, looks at the clock, sits bolt upright, and then flies down the stairs thinking he/she is late for school. It happened last week, so I'm thinking it won't happen, but it's too funny when it does. Of course, they knew about the inclement weather, despite my assurances that the last few storms missed us and it looked like this one would, too. Maybe they bought it. Probably not. They're less gullible than I am.
7:08 a.m. - OMG! Woo hoo! I got TWO of them...they both jumped up and ran downstairs...and, the reaction? "You mean I woke up for nothing?"
Welcome to my world. It's okay. They like me here.
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